Saturday, April 30, 2005

Kids, you gotta love 'em...

I remember when I was a kid....(see, still 30 days til XXX, and I'm already breakin' out the "When I was a kid..." stories).....I did a lot of weird, dangerous and gross things. Frogs, ants and snakes in the teachers desk, jumping off the roof, telling my younger brother and sister that the salt was sugar. But my children, bless them, take the cake in the wierd/ morbid catagory. They, as kids do, like to pretend;
"I'm a princess and you are my slave." or "Come into my restaurant."
But I've noticed a somewhat desturbing trend lately. Everything is DEAD! Yes, dead. But more specificly, dead deer. Take for example a recent car trip. I will try to keep this verbatim. Here we go....
T:"Sissy, lets play that I'm your baby, and I am crying and I won't stop."
H:"Ok sister, and I have a baby kitty and Im her mommy."
T:"Ok and pretend that we had to burry the kitty 'cause it was dead!"
But wait, it gets better......
H:"Now we burried her but she's not realy all the way dead."
T:"yeah, and so we were gonna save her but there was this dead deer."
H:"With blood?"
T:"Yeah, all over. And you were still crying, but not 'cause of the deer, but 'cause your kitty didn't like you any more, and wanted to come home with me."
H:"And I was mad at you so I killed your daddy, and then I had to go to jail."
Ah, children, ain't they sweat? When they're not dead.

Friday, April 29, 2005

Triple's almost here....

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Not Ice Cube, not Vin......Me.
Big 3-0. But don't say thirty, say "TRIPLE X!" It sounds way cooler.
Im okay with it now, but my wife will tell you that for several weeks, I was anything but cool. It's part of waking from the coma (read blogger profile), for the time you were snoozin', your mind didn't age. But as I figured out last Sunday after a 'friendly' game of softball with a few much younger friends, the body moves on with or without ya. After a much needed massage....MMMM ......sorry.... I'm back and ready to go again.
So what does XXX mean these days?
*Young friends are often convinced you don't dig My Chemical Romance and Evanescence just because you are old (could be, but I seriously doubt it).
*Friends your age will try to convince you that Motley Crue and Poison were classic bands (nope, they sucked then and they suck even more today).
*I can see where I've been and how its shaped who I am. There are things I'm not proud of and other things that were painful but so essential for character development.
One thing I fear about getting older is that I'm going to turn into one of those people who constantly tell stories about when they were younger. It's odd how much the world has changed. "I remember life without computers. I have lived through 6 presidents. I remember when atari was cutting edge." But how fun is that!
So I look forward, with my (slightly graying) head held high. I'll show those young punks I've still got it! (the massages will just be between you and me)
And remember, "It's not the years, it's the mileage." -M

Thursday, April 28, 2005

If it's good enough for him...

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I have to start by saying that I'm actually not a huge fan of "FourBucks", but they're on every corner. Some times you need ("Im gettin' the shakes, man!") a cup, and you don't have time to drive to your fav spot. So I recently found my self in need of a a quick fix, and wouldn't you know it, there's a SB! (and one right across the street, too!?)
So I pull into the parking lot, and I notice there's a dude at the drive-thru! UGGG.
I can put up with alot, but male baristas.... not happenin' for me! Its not that they can't make a good cup of sludge, but if Im gonna fork out $6.00 for joe, I wanna pretty face to give it to me. Is that so wrong?
Well I didn't give up, I pulled into a parking space and headed inside.....AHHHHH!
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Sausage fest!
So I did the only thing I could......pretend I'm looking for someone, and quickly make my escape! I'm recovering though. I made it across the street, ordered my addiction (I'm not really addicted, I can stop when ever I want...really!)and proceeded on my way. I still carry the scar....M

I hate trends....

Gawd, i really hope no one sees this.
I hate trends. My favorite to hate right this second has got to be the sweatbands. what the hell?
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(is that a garage door opener he's talking to?), 3/4 of the poeple wearing them have never sweated in thier lives! Me, I sweat just thinking about sweating, b ut I won't wear the damn things.Speaking of trends, how about that whole 'Blog thing'? All of a sudden, every loser with a keyboard has a site...........ah.......well......nothing else for now.