"Have you ever.....?"

Snuck out of the house........ When I was a kid or lately? Yes, both. Bet Im in trouble now.
Gotten lost in your city.........It has one stop light! Some times I think Ive lost my mind.
Seen a shooting star.......... This one time in California, I was at this bar with Robert Blake……
Been to any other countries besides Canada.......Canada is another country? Holy crap, I just thought they were weird.
Had a serious surgery........ I’ve had to pull my head outta my ass a few times, by I didn’t need a surgeon for it!
Gone out in public in your pajamas....... I used to go every where in my PJs when I was in college.
Kissed a stranger.......... Heck yeah! I’ve kissed some real strange ones (do my children count? They are real strange.)
Hugged a stranger......... Everyone needs a hug some times!
Been in a fist fight......... What, you wanna peice of me?
Been arrested.......... Not yet....
Laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose...... No, but in Jr High, my friend Phil, made this HUGE milk bubble come out his nose.
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator........ Every time (if my girls don’t beat me to it)
Swore at your parents......... I swore at my mom once when I was 17, and my dad slap the crap outta me. Now we can’t get my mom to QUIT swearing.
Been in love........For the last 11 years!
Been close to love….. She’s right over on the couch now…..?
Been to a casino......... Which one? I’ve donated to quite a few. Doing my part to return what was taken from the Native Americans.
Been skydiving..........Not yet. Im a big pussy, so probably never.
Skinny dipped........... No, well, yes, I guess. Does naked in a hot tub with my wife while on vacation count?
Skipped school...........What’s school? Oh, THAT’S where everyone was when I would wake up!
Seen a therapist........ I saw Freud at my favorite coffee shop just the other day. (Non-Action figures)
Done the splits...........Yeah, right!
Played spin the bottle........... I wanted to sooooo bad, but it always got broken up before it got to me. Played truth or dare once, but while everyone was daring to make out with everyone else, I was mostly passed out!
Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour..........MMMMMOOOOOOO!, Yes, but Im not proud.
Bitten someone.......... Yeah, but she smelled REALLY yummy!
Been to Niagara Falls.... Yep. Been there done that, both sides. Canada was much better.
Gotten the chicken pox.......Hasn’t every one?
Kissed a member of the same sex....... My dad!
Crashed into a friend's car........ Don’t think so.
Been to Japan......... (Sorry Steve, but yours was a classic answer!) No, but I have a lotta stuff from there!
Ridden in a taxi............ Yeah, smelled like ass.
Been dumped........... I have a trailer that I need to load up and take there this week end…..the dump, right?
Shoplifted............ If a tree falls in the forest and nobody saw you do it……
Been fired.............Nope, but I quit a lot of jobs.
Had a crush on someone of the same sex......... Nahh, guys are just too hairy!
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back........... How about if I touched them while they were sleeping, and they didn’t feel it? What! I drew a mustache on a buddy while he was pasted out. You’re just gross, how could you think that?
Gone on a blind date............. No
Lied to a friend............ No, cause the “Truth will make you……”
Had a crush on a teacher............ Yes! Miss Turner, my second grade teacher. She was from Ireland, and had an amazing accent.
Slept with a co-worker............ I work in construction, so GAUD NO!
Been married........... Yeah, but don’t tell my wife!
Had children.............Had one for lunch, tasty……okay, yeah I have 2 girls.
Seen someone die............I was at this club, open mike, and this one guy totally was dying. When I was in 9th grade I saw my friend Gabe get hit by a car while crossing the hi-way to catch a ride with our carpool. I sang “Friends” by Michael W Smith at his memorial.
Had a close friend die.....See above.
Been to Africa............No, I sun burn really bad.
Driven over 400 miles in one day..........Several times. Seattle to Oregon.
Been to US............Is that in Canada?
Been to Mexico.......... I had Taco Bell for lunch the other day.
Been to India............Every time I call Dell Customer support! “Tank you bedy, bedy much!”
Been on a plane............ Yes, I love the food!
Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.......... Hold on…….”LETS DO THE TIME WARP, AGAIN!”
Thrown up in a bar.......... Guy walks into a bar….. he should’ a ducked!” No.
Purposely set a part of myself on fire........ This one time, while I was playing poker online, I was totally on fire!
Eaten sushi.......... Gimme Fish ‘n Chips anytime! (Cook it, or leave it in the pond!
Been skiing/snowboarding............. took the whole Fam. Skiing on our last vacation. Every one loved it!
Met someone in person from the internet......... Nah.
Lost a child............. Not yet, but not for lack of trying!
Gone to college/university......... I went, I saw, I drank some beer!
Graduated college/university.......... I went I saw……I went home early (and broke)
Fired a gun................. My grand fathers den wall looked like the zoo morgue. Of course.
Purposely hurt yourself...........I am married and have children… I can only take so much!
Taken painkillers.....MMMM, gimme a ‘V’… gimme a ‘I’…. gimme a ‘C’…..gimme …. Uh…. Some more please!
Been intimate with someone of the same gender..........That question is so gay…..Not that there’s anything wrong with that

So now, thanks to Steve’s Nude Blog, who gives thanks to /stacy, for letting me steal this. (Like they had a say in it). Now you have some more interesting (albeit shallow) insight into who the hell I am.
ME